I should be sleeping... I had a busy day and there's more to come tomorrow. However... I had Japanese for the first time tonight so I decided that was definitely blogworthy. Secondly... the bachelorette was miserable tonight. You know it's a bad sign when someone texts 22 minutes into a two hour show questioning why we were watching this... "It's like a car accident." And yet we keep watching.
It is so easy to sit at home and judge the people on tv. How in the world could billy do that or how could suzy let that happen? I go back and forth remembering we are only seeing a sliver of the whole story but also remembering that the "contestants" knew what they were signing up for and agreed to put their story on display giving the power to the editors. I know all of this and still get sucked into the stories. I see myself in the stories. I get mad at the jerks, laugh with the jokesters and feel sad with the heartbroken.
The only way this makes any sense is if I can somehow use their experience to better myself. I pray I can recognize the "Franks" (and really "Jasons" too) in the world and run away. I also pray I can be decisive in my relationships and never be a "Frank." I pray I can see through the "Justins" in the world and never even have to meet one while also praying I am never in a similar situation so far from the truth. I pray I can sort through the mess of our human hearts and find truth, authenticity and love without fear, disrespect or dishonesty.
You'd think after 28 years I'd have this figured out...
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