happily ever after...

I read Karen Kingsbury's newest book today, "The Chance." I've read all of her books and continue to be captivated by her stories... scooped up and drawn into the characters' lives. Sometimes I've wondered whether the stories are too perfect. Don't get me wrong, there's heartache... tears, dying, tragedies... but it always seems like there's a "happily ever after" ending. I'm guessing that's probably a requirement in Christian fiction test polls, but I'm not sure how much of it is real life. Or maybe it's just not wrapped into neatly packaged stories. Our happily ever afters don't always come when we want them.

*SPOILER ALERT* Stop here if you're a die hard Kingsbury reader who hasn't read the book yet... I might give away too much... even if I think you could guess the ending. 

I don't want to give away all the sappy details... because I think the story is worth reading, (obviously if I read all 320 pages in a few hours today) but the story centers around a girl... Ellie. It begins when she's 15 and being whisked away from everything she knows including her best friend, a guy who says he's going to marry her when they grow up. They bury some letters and agree to meet back in 11 years to dig them up just in case they lose touch. Things don't go exactly according to plan, but nevertheless, the guy never stops searching for her and they eventually reunite 11 years later. 

I have dated my fair share of guys and for one reason or another, the relationships haven't worked out. Sometimes we tried again... and again. Sometimes I couldn't run far enough away and sometimes I kept hoping we could give it another try. Occasionally you find one you would wait 11 years for... and sometimes God answers the prayer like Kingsbury's book and there's a happily ever after reunion. But sometimes, God answers the prayer another way... with a different kind of happily ever after. 

I didn't get my happily ever after today, but I feel like I got my answer to a six year prayer. I don't know what my "happily ever after" will look like, but tonight I'm thankful for answers. I am thankful God knows better than I do and I'm thankful for stories that bring hope in the waiting. 

longing...

One of my favorite authors is Karen Kingsbury. I first read One Tuesday Morning in 2003 and have been captivated by Kingsbury's books ever since. I suppose they could be considered predictable... but I'm grateful for books that share a positive message through some not so positive circumstances all the time. I suppose they could be considered unrealistic or too fairy tale... but I'm grateful for books that give me hope for my own fairy tale.

Kingsbury has written more than 60 books, but my favorite series is actually an ongoing storyline throughout a number of her four or five-book series that first started around the Baxter family in the Redemption Series. Four series later, Kingsbury started the Bailey Flanagan series and recently released "Longing."

Without giving away the entire series, midway through the book, the main character goes to church Christmas Eve with friends and hears a message on longing. Kingsbury writes...

"'This time of year people are longing... We long for love and relationship and healing and hope... But this Christmas God wants us to long for so much more.' He spoke then about longing for holiness, for a closer walk with Jesus, for God's truth to speak louder than the noise of the world. 'When we long for the right things, we find a different sort of love. The kind of love that will never let go of us, never let us down. Never walk away or disown us. A love that knows us and our flaws but stays anyway.' He paused. 'For us... to long for God is to long for a perfect love.'"

The circumstances around the message make for a moving story, but even apart from Bailey Flanagan's story, the pastor's message is poignant. So many people are hurting... searching... longing for a perfect love. We want to be wanted... to be accepted... to be listened to... and God's love gives us all of that.

I am grateful for Karen Kingsbury's stories... but ultimately I'm grateful for God's love, sacrifice and acceptance to fulfill my own longing.

Official book trailer...

remember...

It's not often I write a blog two days in a row. During the school year I can go weeks without writing. Some part of my brain wakes up during the summer when I can read more... watch movies more... I think more. Sometimes good and sometimes not so good.

First of all I finished another book today. Not sure if I've told you before but I'm a big Karen Kingsbury fan. She writes Christian fiction and I've been caught up in her books for years. She has carried the story of one family through four different series of four books (as in 16 if I did my math correctly!) with another series on the way. I get caught up in the characters fictional or not and it reminds me of who I want to be. They're not short, but usually an easy read that I can finish in a day or two. This is good because I'm dying to get to the end, not so good when I have wait months to get the next book.

I also watched "Remember Me" today. I had no idea what to expect... I think it came out in the middle of "Dear John" and "Last Song" mania and other than twilight fans going out to see Robert Pattinson... most people missed it. I was expecting a cheesy, fluffy chick flick but there really was substance. Documented numerous times before, I'm a sucker for a good voiceover and Pattinson's charcter Tyler Hawkins wrapped up the movie well with...

Gandhi said that whatever you do in life will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it because nobody else will. Like when someone comes into your life and half of you says: "You're nowhere near ready". And the other half says: "Make her yours forever". Michael, Caroline asked me what would I say if I knew you could hear me. I said: "I do know. I love you. God, I miss you, and I forgive you.

I don't think everything I do in life will be insignificant. I live my life based on my belief that I made the most significant decision of my life to believe in God and have a personal relationship with Him. I can't completely talk about the quote without giving away the movie, but let's say it left an impression. The tagline is "live in the moments." I want to live in the moments...

christmas greetings...

Merry Christmas! It's hard to believe the holiday has come and gone for yet another year. The commercialization of Christmas has started taking over even before Thanksgiving these days, but sometimes it takes me some time to get in the true Christmas spirit. It always helps once I get home and this year I was able to get in a couple of last minute shopping trips along with some baking bonding with my mom to help out. Sometimes I struggle just grasping the true gravity of it all. It can become a bit of a ritual, another religious thing we do without knowing why we do it. I try to imagine what it was like then... what it means for my life now. I love having an excuse to spend time with family and friends but even without all of the people in my life, the birth of Jesus is what counts. I feel like Christmas is just the foreshadowing of what will come in a few months when we celebrate Easter... With that said, I hope everyone had an amazing Christmas.

My mom bought me Shades of Blue, a Karen Kingsbury book for Christmas. I had to finish the book I was in the middle of last night, but I read Shades of Blue today. I'm a huge fan of Kingsbury's work... a Christian fiction author, her books are easy reading that let me escape into another life that I dream about for myself. I first read her 9/11 books, One Tuesday Morning and Beyond Tuesday Morning, and have read everything else since then. On the surface, Shades of Blue would probably be described as a book about abortion, but it meant so much more to me. The main character had to close one chapter of his life before he could move onto the next and I think when you dig deeper it was really about forgiveness.

I think I've said it before, but I'm an expert at holding grudges. Once you've hurt me, I tend to put up walls to try to protect myself from getting hurt again. I keep trying to learn to let go, but I think it's harder to forgive and to let go when the "offender" doesn't apologize for his/her offense. It's easier to walk away. In today's society, it's easier to send a text message or an e-mail then to deal with issues head on. Easier doesn't always make it better, but I keep finding myself finding your wrong rather than dealing with what I can control and movimg on. In Shades of Blue someone apologized 10 years late. I don't want to be 10 years late for any apologies I owe... and I also don't want to sit around 10 years waiting for an apology. 

Luke 6:35-36 "But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back... Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."