I've thought a lot about how to frame this one... how to respect the anonymous but still tell my story. First of all you should know I've decided to wait until I get married to have sex. I don't know the exact moment I made the decision... I think I made it in high school because I was scared of the consequences and made a public decision in August 2000 at a summer camp because I have faith God knows better than I do. One of my friends gave me a ring that matched her own with the initials TLW inscribed on the inside for "True Love Waits" along with the date 8-00 (that I wear on my right hand and people always ask if it's a wedding band).
Most of the time it's a decision I haven't had trouble sticking to... I probably heard my first argument to persuade me otherwise in high school... barely thought about it in college and feel like I deal with it far too often since college. Most days, it's not a temptation... either I don't feel strongly enough about the guy or I hold onto the belief if I can go 28 years surely I can make it longer... and deep down I hold onto the belief I'm worth waiting for.
Lately, I have been amazed by the boldness of guys. Most guys at least try to be slick about what they want, but I actually had one tell me that's really all he wanted... he had no interest in a relationship. I know for sure I'd rather not be a one-night stand or a prostitute or even friends with benefits. Especially when he settles to ask me to come over so he can "service me." (Barf)
Some guys think because I'm waiting it's because I don't want to have sex. Wrong... I just want it to be with my husband. Everyone always asks then where do I draw the line. It gets hard because usually when a relationship ends I wish we hadn't even kissed. One person tried to argue it's like buying shoes, you should try them on first before you buy. My rebuttal would be if someone made a pair of shoes especially to fit your feet, you wouldn't need to try them on. I have faith God has designed the perfect person for me.
Pastor Cook preached from Genesis 39 today on Joseph's temptation with Potiphar. He mentioned a story of a couple he counseled where the guy was waiting to have sex and the girl had "messed up" once but the guy was having a hard time getting over it. He told the guy he needed to decide right away if he could forgive her or not... otherwise he would risk holding it over her head forever.
Forgiveness becomes clutch... and not always my forte. And then Cook relayed the story of the skydiving instructor who broke the fall for a woman when their chute got tangled. He became paralyzed from the accident while she escaped nearly unharmed. He broke her fall... talk about taking one for the team. And of course then I'm reminded of Jesus taking the fall for me... so cheesy but so true. The crucifixion... Jesus on the cross... "dying for our sins"... It all becomes too fairytale-ish until I have a tangible example like a skydiving instructor to put it into context. How does this relate to forgiveness? God put all of our sins... all of the mess ups on that cross and Jesus covered them with his blood. Everything I have done, am doing, will do is forgiven... now I need to pay it forward.
portions of "From the Inside Out" by Hillsong United... my prayer for the week...
In my heart, in my soul.. I give you control.. Consume me from the inside out.. Let justice and praise.. Become my embrace.. To love you from the inside out.. Everlasting, your light will shine when all else fades.. Never ending, your glory goes beyond all fame.. And the cry of my heart is to bring you praise.. From the inside out.. Lord my soul cries out
Most of the time it's a decision I haven't had trouble sticking to... I probably heard my first argument to persuade me otherwise in high school... barely thought about it in college and feel like I deal with it far too often since college. Most days, it's not a temptation... either I don't feel strongly enough about the guy or I hold onto the belief if I can go 28 years surely I can make it longer... and deep down I hold onto the belief I'm worth waiting for.
Lately, I have been amazed by the boldness of guys. Most guys at least try to be slick about what they want, but I actually had one tell me that's really all he wanted... he had no interest in a relationship. I know for sure I'd rather not be a one-night stand or a prostitute or even friends with benefits. Especially when he settles to ask me to come over so he can "service me." (Barf)
Some guys think because I'm waiting it's because I don't want to have sex. Wrong... I just want it to be with my husband. Everyone always asks then where do I draw the line. It gets hard because usually when a relationship ends I wish we hadn't even kissed. One person tried to argue it's like buying shoes, you should try them on first before you buy. My rebuttal would be if someone made a pair of shoes especially to fit your feet, you wouldn't need to try them on. I have faith God has designed the perfect person for me.
Pastor Cook preached from Genesis 39 today on Joseph's temptation with Potiphar. He mentioned a story of a couple he counseled where the guy was waiting to have sex and the girl had "messed up" once but the guy was having a hard time getting over it. He told the guy he needed to decide right away if he could forgive her or not... otherwise he would risk holding it over her head forever.
Forgiveness becomes clutch... and not always my forte. And then Cook relayed the story of the skydiving instructor who broke the fall for a woman when their chute got tangled. He became paralyzed from the accident while she escaped nearly unharmed. He broke her fall... talk about taking one for the team. And of course then I'm reminded of Jesus taking the fall for me... so cheesy but so true. The crucifixion... Jesus on the cross... "dying for our sins"... It all becomes too fairytale-ish until I have a tangible example like a skydiving instructor to put it into context. How does this relate to forgiveness? God put all of our sins... all of the mess ups on that cross and Jesus covered them with his blood. Everything I have done, am doing, will do is forgiven... now I need to pay it forward.
portions of "From the Inside Out" by Hillsong United... my prayer for the week...
In my heart, in my soul.. I give you control.. Consume me from the inside out.. Let justice and praise.. Become my embrace.. To love you from the inside out.. Everlasting, your light will shine when all else fades.. Never ending, your glory goes beyond all fame.. And the cry of my heart is to bring you praise.. From the inside out.. Lord my soul cries out
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