I've acquired quite a few friends over the years... or maybe acquaintances... sometimes they float from one category to another depending on the weather. During the days of pre-internet I always would always pride myself on being a good pen pal. I would even sign up for those programs in magazines where they would try to match you up with people and I would get mad if they wouldn't write me back. I went to camp wo-me-to every summer from 1990-2000 and met a bunch of people and always became irritated if someone quit writing... or maybe never wrote at all. I lived in maryland for 18 years until college became a new obstacle for keeping in touch. Every one vowed to keep in touch... I was determined to hang on to my friends but I think my list of friends from home grew shorter as I found new friends in college. Most people I only really talked to when I was home for breaks or maybe the occasional IM... people try to keep their best friend and/or their boy/girlfriend from high school and it doesn't really work... well I guess it could... but it didn't for me. Even the friends I kept, the friendship was different by the time I finished college.
Over the past three and a half years since I graduated from college I've dealt with the concept of leaving friends and deciding who to keep in touch with... or if I left a friendship on bad terms do I attempt reconciliation and then do we keep in touch? There's a quote about friends coming into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. I used to hate it... why in the world would you plan to have a friend for only a period of time. I thought everyone should keep in touch. I was horrible at letting anyone go.
So now here I am with "friends" all over north america and there's a part of me that is tired of trying to keep in touch with everyone. I'm thankful that things like myspace came around to give us a way to do it without much effort. But... we feel like we're doing a good job of keeping in touch by wishing everyone merry christmas or leaving a happy birthday comment when myspace reminds us it's their birthday. We don't even have to remember our friends' birthdays anymore. We don't need a high school reunion to see who's married or popping out kids or gaining weight. Are we really keeping in touch though? I think it's all well and good as long as both parties view the "friendship" the same.
Beyond the myspace world... how do you figure out who to keep in touch with? It's impossible to keep in touch with everyone... I accept that... but do you have to have been friends for a certain number of years... or do you have to live in the same state... or do you have to have the same relationship status to have something in common... or do you just wait to see who calls... or wait to see who calls you back? Most of the time I don't think we make the decisions consciously... but we're making them whether we realize it or not. I think I realize it even more every time I move...
I'm not sure if I'm really asking for answers as much as I am trying to figure out what's real... should I feel guilty if I don't call everyone back? should I make extra efforts to keep in touch with certain people?
okay the babble is overwhelming... thinking too much... see what a day off does to me...
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