Sure I usually know what to expect. And I usually find some closure, but there's usually a guarantee I'll leave dehydrated from the gallons of tears I shed.
My uncle has been sick for awhile now. At first it didn't seem like a big deal. Most people wouldn't even know it as he was still playing softball and golf and chasing his grandkids around. When I was a kid, I loved to challenge Uncle Woody and my cousin Brian in a quiz game on my "computer." He's so smart and I loved to try to stump him. Every Christmas he handed out Pez dispensers and he had some crazy organizational "quirks" that our family may say I shared with him. Robin blames it on the July birthday thing, but either way I embraced it.
Living in Fayetteville off and on for 10 of the last 16 years while Robin lived here always helped me see Aunt Sharon and Uncle Woody more. When I moved to White Marsh in 2014, I always said I wanted to see them more. In Oct. 2014, Steve and I were talking about engagement, but I had no idea how close it was. He came up to visit and I was adamant that he needed to meet Aunt Sharon and Uncle Woody. I didn't necessarily need their stamp of approval, but I wanted them to be a part of the process before it was official. We made plans to go to dinner one Friday after Steve made the drive up, but of course that would be the weekend he got stuck in some major traffic. We were running late, but I insisted we still go. After dinner I got annoyed because Steve pretended to act like he hadn't even asked my parents' permission to marry me yet and I didn't want to know that and I couldn't imagine how the timing was going to work out. Aunt Sharon and Uncle Woody didn't say a word, but they assured me they liked him.
Fast forward a week later... Steve proposed and my aunt and uncle were a part of a surprise group who met us for dinner to celebrate. I'm so grateful they were both there on one of the biggest days of my life. When we sent our save the date cards, word spread that Steve looked like Uncle Woody and my cousins love to call him Little Woody. Steve knows by now that while "Woody" may not be a man's dream nickname, it's quite the compliment to be compared to my uncle.
Last spring, Uncle Woody's health problems seemed to get a little more serious and the stubborn man that he was... he still tried to play it off. Thankfully, he made it to our wedding in May and while he may not have been the party animal he would've been a couple years ago, it meant the world to me that he was there.
I saw Uncle Woody for the last time over Christmas, but it wasn't really him. My heart ached seeing the daily grind Aunt Sharon was living with and the difficulties Uncle Woody was having to struggle with. It's hard to find the good when you see disease stealing a person like that.
I can't imagine what Aunt Sharon is going through now that he passed away this morning... or what their kids or grandkids are going through but I'm one of a ton of people whose heart aches knowing he's not here with us anymore. At the same time I feel some relief that he's not stuck in that body anymore. And yet somehow that doesn't help me miss him any less...
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