Once again a drought in blogging... but I didn't hear a lot of complaining so I think I may have been the only one who noticed. :)
In the past 73 days I've managed to stay busy. I bought a house. My parents freaked out, but they've since come around... at least to my face, which I appreciate. I'm not sure I'll ever know if it was the best decision, but I'm relieved to not have to pay rent... not to mention I know a whole lot more about mortgages, real estate and home repairs.
I've thought a lot about communication lately. It keeps coming up and I feel like it's a cliche to say so but I really think it's one of the pillars of most friendships/relationships between people. I want to trust the people in my life and I base trust on if I feel like you're communicating honestly with me. Sometimes I believe people are speaking honestly, but then they act differently. Is it our words or our actions that are then trustworthy? Most of the time I would say actions... but occasionally I wonder if you just don't have the nerve to act on who you are. But then if you don't have the nerve, maybe you really are the "dishonest" actions. And of course I didn't even question if your thoughts aligned with your words and/or actions.
Are you dizzy yet? I think I just talked myself in circles. I am constantly telling myself to not invest myself so much in people because they will just disappoint. And yet time and time again I set myself up hoping for a different outcome only to be let down. I tried to pull off that whole "go with the flow" vibe and I suck at it. It's not me. I thought my words and actions could change my thought process but it didn't work. Here's to letting go...
